Wishing things were different

I listened to the lyrics of sadness and regret.

I walked a lonely mile to find relief in sweat.

My heart ached to run and flee an unpaid debt.

Memory serves a proverb, upon which thoughts are set.

I wished that God would free me of these trials.

He spoke long ago concerning such lonely miles;

A path beset by creatures of endless, angry wiles.

It twists and turns and spirals through the darkened aisles.

I pass the working masses exchanging empty smiles

to find and sit behind a station with lists arranged in files.

I wished to find strong counsel to lead me through the rain.

A mirror caught my troubles.  A wet and reddened stain.

It garnishes my muscles swollen from constant strain.

The color flows from unknown places, but yet familiar pain.

My watch called out to mock me and share with me its disdain

God's word says that rough places will one day be made plain.

Yet, the same path falls before me.  I walk it daily without gain.

I lift my eyes to find the rainbow; an end to endless bane.

I wished I had more choices, that I could change my past.

Or that I knew the future, how long such troubles last.

Like a ship upon the wasteland adorned by a useless mast

I await my future, already prophesied and held so deeply fast.

Like a servant of an older time bound to lower caste

and surrounded with unrighteousness by which he is surpassed.

I wished that things were different.  A worthless dream I know.

A vast field lay before me for which I've no seed to sow.

So I offer you these wishes.  I pray thee would bestow.

That a worthy door would open, give me a chance to grow.

but grow in measured fashion, in some way to me that'll show

to my own impatient eyes; reveal this invisible foe.

I pray for peace or some release; to overcome this woe.

I wish I didn't feel this way before.  I don't feel that way today.

I was lost between the raindrops, I forgot to stop and play.

I know some smiles are empty, but I can fill them in some way.

I can share the gift that I was given, a debt I'm glad to pay.

I remind myself as I read Jude's letter, that Jesus is the way.

He's a path through pain and heavy burdens that might cause me to stray.

I need but fix my eyes on Him, His word and that which it might say.

Then just see the altar waiting there for my troubles now to lay.

I wish, if you are reading, I have said a proper thing.

I hope I've given you a blessing; that it rides upon a wing.

If you are the prodigal son, come home. The master has for you a ring.

I pray you find your way through troubles; give them over to the king.

By JAPOC